KFC’s Nail Polish That Tastes Like Chicken Is Wrong in So Many Ways

Published by Melinda McKee.

When we first heard that KFC was launching a chicken-flavored edible nail polish, we threw up in our mouths a little, before we had a very real “wtf?” moment. The cruelty that inquisitive social animals such as chickens endure to end up in a drive-through bucket is appalling. And nail polish that has been tested on gentle animals such as rabbits and mice is equally disturbing. But we got to thinking, anything can be veganized nowadays, so why not this? Using KFC’s very sound logic, we’ve paired cruelty-free nail polish and vegan chicken recipes and products that you’ll definitely want to try out together. Because obviously.

wet n wild’s fun colors would look spectacular paired with some rainbow zucchini rolls made with Tofurky Slow Roasted Thai Basil Chik’n. If you haven’t paired these two things in your head already, you’re obviously very behind on today’s chicken/polish trends.

Zucchini Rolls with Tofurky Thai Basil Chick'n

How about pairing an adorable wing* manicure using ncLA polish with buffalo-style cauliflower wings*?

buffalo-cauliflower-wings

*Neither of these actually hurt or stole wings from live chickens.

The Body Shop sells an orange polish that would 100 percent go really well with Trader Joe’s Chicken-less Mandarin Orange Morsels.

Beyond Meat Feisty Buffalo Poppers would clearly go well with some hot pink polish by all-vegan company Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics. Clearly.

https://www.instagram.com/p/_5WFSby0Vf/

You can get wild with a muted polish color from SpaRitual and a delicious recipe using Simple Truth Meatless Griller Strips—simplicity for your hands and mouth.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BDyXthwEiAB/
https://www.instagram.com/p/-ZwTjcsKoc/

We couldn’t see a better pairing than this 100% Pure polish and a vegan chicken salad sandwich using Beyond Meat Chicken-Free Strips:

Vegan Chicken Salad Sandwich

Gardein Crispy Chick’n Sliders dazzle with Beauty Without Cruelty:

Dazzling.

This adorable feathered mani using ella+mila polish wouldn’t be complete without these vegan chicken skewers with pineapple marinade. Obviously.

And a stunner from Pacifica’s all-vegan line would make this vegan chicken and waffles plate simply magical.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BDjBX1zJDzK/

Urban Decay has some bold colors that would look perfect wrapped around a vegan fried chicken sandwich.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BC5g4LsKvx-/

Chik-fil-a-Copycat-Fried-Chicken-Burger-1024x682

Yep, perfecto.

So there you have it. We used KFC’s logic to make our most insane (re: creative) list yet.

Not into KFC’s latest marketing scheme? No worries. Living cruelty-free has never been easier, from what you eat to what you paint your nails with! Other cruelty-free vegan nail polish offerings include Acquarella, Flower Beauty, Jesse’s Girl Cosmetics, Manic Panic, Mineral Fusion, and Nubar. If in doubt, use our database to check the cruelty-free status of beauty brands.

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