I have flipped through Guinness World Records more than once, searching for a record that I could break. Longest fingernails? No thanks. Longest bout of hiccups? Whoa, 68 years!
Turns out, I’m not the only one looking. KFC is hoping to make a name for itself—other than Kentucky Fried Cruelty … or the company with the most people who’ve resigned from its animal welfare committee … or the company that’s most resistant to taking any effort to stop chickens from being scalded alive in its de-feathering tanks—by attempting to break the world record for (wait for it) most people doing the chicken dance at once.
The Guinness World Records folks have already shown that they are a sensible and decent bunch by stating, “We do not accept records based on the killing or harming of animals.” So we’ve now approached them to ask them to refuse to accept record attempts from companies that have yet to adopt even modest humane reforms to reduce the needless suffering of animals. After all, the chicken dance is what people do at weddings and bat mitzvahs. Who wants it associated with the pain of billions of chickens, many of whose throats were cut while they were still conscious?
Here’s hoping you’ll be seeing my name in Guinness World Records before anyone shakes their tail feathers for KFC.
Written by Shawna Flavell