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Test Your Animal Smarts!

Written by PETA | October 23, 2007

Owl.jpgHey, I didn’t write the title for this post, so don’t take it out on me. It’s actually a reference to a feature that appeared in everyone’s favorite quarterly publication, Animal Times, this fall. And I thought it was pretty damn cute.

For most of the regular commenters, this quiz isn’t mandatory—feel free to just skim through and look for the funny parts. But Halo Snipe, the bad Steve, Dr. C, and Mars: I’m expecting you all to post your scores. I’m guessing you four aren’t PETA members already, but if you’ve just been waiting for that extra incentive, Animal Times comes free when you donate $16 or more.

Anyway here it is. No cheating (answers after the jump).

Do you know everything there is to know about what’s happening in the finned, feathered, and furry world of animals? To find out, put on your thinking cap (synthetic, of course) and use your primate prowess to answer the following questions:

1. According to a 2006 Harvard study, people who frequently eat chicken have a 52 percent greater chance of developing what disease?
a. Bird flu
b. Impotence
c. Bladder cancer

2. The stress of captivity sometimes causes dolphins to:
a. Kill their trainers
b. Obsessively watch Gilligan’s Island reruns
c. Commit suicide

3. In Anna Wintour’s closet, you might find the skins of:
a. Former assistants
b. Cats and dogs
c. Leopards
d. All of the above

4. Which of the following cosmetics companies still tests on animals?
a. Revlon
b. Estée Lauder
c. Clinique
d. CoverGirl

5. Which of the following animals have brains similar to humans’ and are able to remember 50 faces from photographs for up to two years?
a. Sheep
b. Dolphins
c. Ted Nugent

6. Former US Vice President Al Gore could save more water by not eating a pound of beef than by:
a. Disabling the irrigation system at his Tennessee mansion
b. Not showering for a year
c. Cutting back to six lattes a day

7. Which country has a political party dedicated to animal protection?
a. The Netherlands
b. Tonga
c. India

8. Which celebrity had a change of heart about wearing fur after being named on PETA’s 2006 Worst-Dressed list?
a. Lindsay Lohan
b. Christina Ricci
c. The GEICO cave man

9. Animals at The National Zoo in Washington, D.C., have died after:
a. Eating poison put in their enclosure to kill rats
b. Their infections went untreated for weeks or months
c. Being crushed by a hydraulic door
d. All of the above

10. The president of which country is a vegan whose Easter message encouraged people to spare animals from “our lust for meat”?
a. Serbia
b. Slovenia
c. Sweden

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  • Caboose says:

    Ariel I said assume because before you called us anti’s animal haterskillersabusers Which is false attention seeking losers False. I guess only PETA members can have the first ammendment without criticism and ignorance and it seems that you think that all omnivores are evil. I said friends because Michelle Ana and others must be your friends. I take the “ABomb” back. 999 apologies usocialist

  • Mars says:

    “So you must definitely be a woos because you still weren’t even brave enough to specify who you were addressing even AFTER I encouraged you to do so in order for other readers to know who you were referring to specifically.” You did not “encourage but asked. “”Uh space cadetMars when you quote me and address my quote I would appreciate it if you would specify who you are quoting and addressing. Thank you” Sorry for you that I do not need to follow your rules.Reference though that Mike Q asked the same thing and I did as he asked with him. Then again his replies are civil and intelligent.Go figure. “To the contray space cadet MARS I am very capabale of recognizing my own quotes otherwise I wouldn’t have addressed your comment. DUUUHHHH!” Evidently not since you are now insisting I label them for you.DDDUUUHHH “Btw I’m still waiting for you to quote with time and date all the claims I was supposed to have made according to you which of course I did not recognize because I did not make those claims.” Actualy I did on the appropriate topics.Too bad your reading comprehension is so lousy you can’t even make sense of your own posts. I’m still waiting on you to paste that study that you say was done the proves that poeple who abuse animals become criminals.

  • Ariel says:

    To the contray space cadet MARS I am very capabale of recognizing my own quotes otherwise I wouldn’t have addressed your comment. DUUUHHHH! So you must definitely be a woos because you still weren’t even brave enough to specify who you were addressing even AFTER I encouraged you to do so in order for other readers to know who you were referring to specifically. What are you afraid of? Btw I’m still waiting for you to quote with time and date all the claims I was supposed to have made according to you which of course I did not recognize because I did not make those claims. So it proves that what ever you claim about anything or anyone are concoctions distortions andor total nonsense. Anyway thank you for proving ALL of my points about you which didn’t even really require proof to the intelligent readers on this blog site. You have been proving all those things all along all by yourself.

  • Ariel says:

    To any “new” readerscommenters on here I would like to make it very clear that I do NOT “assume” anything. In fact I am more aware of assuming than a lot of people who use the word “assume” freely or frequently and I have even written at great length about the mistakes of making “assumptons” previously. Therefore when I wrote the word “assumed” in one of my posts it clearly had identifiable marks around it which indicated some “question” or strong possiblity but not particular known fact. However having said that two of the four males have identified themselves to be males yet that is STILL questionable on a blog site. Nevertheless the remainder of my comments in that post would be factual providing ANY one to four are males but are not “gentlemen” according to the nature of their previous comments. And Ariel’s friends? did not make any assumptions either. But a commenter had cautioned us about the “risks” of assuming. So I am well aware of assume.

  • Mars says:

    “Uh space cadetMars when you quote me and address my quote I would appreciate it if you would specify who you are quoting and addressing. Thank you” Why? Are you that incapable of not reconizing your own comments? “4. you can spend thousands of dollars to kill one or the alloted amount of wild animals during a particular killing season just to say you needed meat. even though a thousand dollars would feed a lot more of the needy.” Thousands? Nope. I pay $130.for my resident license.Feed the needy? Nope I hunt for my own family not others. They can go kill their own. “5. you don’t believe or care that animals feel any pain or only feel a little pain when they are trapped for their furs or shot with arrows. even though they linger in excruciating pain up to hours or days until death.” Pain is a fact of life and nobody or no thing is exempt no matter the Utopian world you dream about and will never happen. “a you appreciate nature because you just mostly enjoy being in the woods with the fresh air and seeing wildlife.” Nope. I hunt to kill.I don’t go hunting to look at trees. “b wildlife needs to be controlled because they are starving to death. even though you proudly “bag” the largest animals and any animals that are at no risk for starvation” Nope. All animals in a group starve not just certain ones.Hunting controls the population so starvation doesn’t become a problem.Largest animal? So why do we kill females and small game if we only want the “largest”? “d you believe that you are an expert at controlling wildlife even though hunters can and have brought some species to the point of near extinction or extinction” Nope.Habitat destruction is the 1 cause of animal endangerment and always has been and you are part and party to that destruction.We leave the claim of “expert” to you that have probaly never seen a wild animal. “e your hunting expenses goes towards preservation and conservation because you think that is the most honorable way wildlife and “game” land can be saved.” And how would you preserve the wildlife? Spay and nueter and put them in zoos..eerr..shelters? “7. you believe that wildlife was put on this earth to be killed for your personal pleasure or hobby or because it’s a “great” legacy handed down from past generations.” Nope. There is a natural order that has to be followed and hunting is part of it. “8. you believe that killing wild animals is a “sport” so you believe that makes you a “brave” “sportsman.” Nope.Those that call it a sport are those not very good at it. “9. you believe that hunters are responsible people even though some of them shoot and sometimes kill each other ” That would then make anybody with a car unresponsible as far more people are killed by them.That would then include yourself most likely. “10. you believe that no other hunters have realized that killing animals was wrong and cruel… Even though they became NONhunters and MORE are continuing to become NONhunters and also speak out AGAINST hunting! Nope. And PETA supporters have also left that group and became hunters.FYI there are more hunters in this State then PETA supporters WORLDWIDE.

  • Caboose says:

    An alternative to hunting would be bounty hunting. OOOh yeah there’s a new Boba Fett in town!

  • Ariel says:

    Find out if you pass the “Hunter Education” test. You will pass with answering but not having to admit to one or most of the following 1. you enjoy killing wildlife because you have no respect or compassion for wild animals. 2. you can change the meaning of “killed” into “bagged.” 3. you don’t think that you have a bloodlust desire to kill innocent beings. even though it’s really a need to fulfill a sense of superiority over “lesser” beings 4. you can spend thousands of dollars to kill one or the alloted amount of wild animals during a particular killing season just to say you needed meat. even though a thousand dollars would feed a lot more of the needy. 5. you don’t believe or care that animals feel any pain or only feel a little pain when they are trapped for their furs or shot with arrows. even though they linger in excruciating pain up to hours or days until death. 6. you can TRY to FOOL nonhunters by saying any most or all of the following a you appreciate nature because you just mostly enjoy being in the woods with the fresh air and seeing wildlife. b wildlife needs to be controlled because they are starving to death. even though you proudly “bag” the largest animals and any animals that are at no risk for starvation c wildlife needs to be controlled because of overpopulation but you don’t consider that hunters andor greedy mankind has interfered enough with nature already d you believe that you are an expert at controlling wildlife even though hunters can and have brought some species to the point of near extinction or extinction e your hunting expenses goes towards preservation and conservation because you think that is the most honorable way wildlife and “game” land can be saved. d you are a humble humanitarian because you donate some of your hunted meat to soup kitchens for the needy even though you boast about it and hunting orgs. boast about it in the newspapers. 7. you believe that wildlife was put on this earth to be killed for your personal pleasure or hobby or because it’s a “great” legacy handed down from past generations. 8. you believe that killing wild animals is a “sport” so you believe that makes you a “brave” “sportsman.” 9. you believe that hunters are responsible people even though some of them shoot and sometimes kill each other but you can never be a victim. 10. you believe that no other hunters have realized that killing animals was wrong and cruel… Even though they became NONhunters and MORE are continuing to become NONhunters and also speak out AGAINST hunting!

  • Caboose says:

    Ariel the ABomb and Friends When you assume crap you make an ass out of u and me! Hey there is the third meaning of the ABomb!.

  • Ariel says:

    Uh space cadetMars when you quote me and address my quote I would appreciate it if you would specify who you are quoting and addressing. Thank you. Ana I think that was an interesting point about the anti’s “fears.” Apparently there are deeper reasons than just resisting being educated about animal rights other than the reasons the anti’s present. It seems as if they are so accustomed to not having or extending compassion and unfortunately so familiar with accepting violence as the norm that they have become comfortable with themselves as is. So it seems that anyone who they perceive as “invading” their comfortable familiaritiesideations and habits they lash out in defense due to having a fear of the unfamiliar. It seems like it is easier for them to express hatred or any similar type comment than to take the first one small step towards even considering challenging their own fears of being open to change that they might not even really realize they have. And of course change is not always easy. In fact I know some women who are so resistant to change that they refuse to change their same hairstyle they have had for the past 30 years! As for me I think it would be a VERY boring life if I were to be stagnant and narrowminded. And thanks to being involved in animal rights I have learned more about so many broadened areas of life that otherwise I highly doubt if I would have ever known. May the animals finally be free of mankind’s fears insecurities hate and greed.

  • steve says:

    I GUESS YOU DIDN’T LIKE MY QUIZ?????

  • Ana says:

    Hello Ariel! Your October 24 834 comment is completely accurate. EAS You also are completely right! Peace to both of you!

  • rojo says:

    anon perforated ulcers are no longer thought to be caused by stress but it can be a contributing factor. Infection is the main culprit. Could you tell us how many cause of death reports state suicide?

  • Mr. Chief says:

    Ariel WOW! One little comment like mine and you go off like a bomb The ABomb. Triple meaning!! I am not a person like what you just described! In case you are wondering Mr. Chief is a parody of Master Chief from Halo. Search for it you might like it.

  • Ana says:

    Michael Q ….and very talented guitarists they truly are. Ariel Thanks for your accurate perception of the animal haterskillersabusers. The implementation of animal rights philosophy would change everything and that is what these losers fear. Fear of compassion and nonviolence and of course loss of revenue from killing animals. But happily the numbers of animal rights advocates are growing daily worlwide. Peace!

  • Kristin says:

    I also said all of the above for Anna Wintour’s closet. She is evil and all the makeup and couture in the world could never make her beautiful!

  • EAS says:

    Why why why do we mention the names of those who have a lot to learn about compassion. By naming the nameless “But a b c and d Im expecting you all to post your scores.” you’re giving attention to those who don’t deserve it. We as a society should focus on people who can offer a valuable contribution. By giving attention to the nameless you are encouraging the bad behavior to continue. All they want is attention. Let’s ignore them and maybe they’ll go away. I’m not saying ignore those who have opposing views. Just those who provide comments that are obviously uneducated.

  • Ariel says:

    This is what I gathered from poster 102407 1118 am who has been saying this all along anyway By mentioning my name I am enjoying my recognition even more! My different perspective than PETA’s passion about wildlife is that I am passionate about killing wildlife. I am extremely thankful for this forum and appreciate PETA’s passion for its cause because this gives me daily opportunities to express my contempt for ar’s activism and ar’s activists. Although I NEVER agree with PETA I realize the GREAT “importance” of freely expressing my antianimal rights’ viewpoints on an animal rights’ blog site because I get my kicks out of tryng to knock around ar’s activists the irrational bigots! I really wish that all of you ar’s activists would go away and I am not happy about all of you expressing your justifiable opinions but you should definitely read all of mine which “justifiably” makes great attempts to insult and degrade everything that you believe. If every ar’s activists agreed with me then we would all be enjoying the great joys of killing animals. Try your best but I am not going to change because a leopard doesn’t change its spots.

  • rojo says:

    ariel nice to know you still care

  • Mars says:

    And wild dolphins never commit suicide by swimming onto beaches. “However that doesn’t classify them as “gentlemen.” ” Nor does being female make you a Lady. From your comments here I’d say your as far from being a Lady as any female can be.

  • Anonymous says:

    Suicide is the second most common cause of death in captivity behind perforated ulcers from stress. They either open their blowholes underwater and drown themselves or slam their heads repeatedly against their bleak cement tank walls until they die from brain trauma or a buildup of blood in the cerebral cavity. But they’re “happy” so it’s okay…. These and other “natural” causes of captive death electrocution malnutrition swallowing foreign objects are a matter of public record and can be found on the annual MMIR.

  • rojo says:

    while not formally invited I’d like to make a few comments. 1 you need to state skinless chicken because no significant increase was found from chicken cooked with the skin on. Bacon is even worse at 59. 2 suicide is a difficult diagnosis as it requires the animal to have a concept of dying and that doing so will end it’s suffering. I don’t doubt that it could be a result of captivity induced selfharm dolphins unlike humans don’t breathe if knocked unconscious which could happen when swimming into a pool wall. Free the dolphins well those that haven’t been bred in captivity anyway. 3 fur is for freaks but why be particularly offended that it comes from cats and dogs. 4 I’m surprised any cosmetic company still animal tests. Yes it will sting your eyes if you get it in there. 5 I guess this is one animal experiment peta approves of. Maybe we all look alike to sheep too. 6 depends how long his showers are. 7 Don’t know much about dutch politics but Marianne Thieme is cute enough to get my vote. 8 shed the fur keep the leather. 9 nothing that doesn’t happen in suburbia although hydraulic door injuries might be a little rare. 10 they must do easter a little differently in slovenia ham is not something I would associate with this occasion. The presidents easter comments relate only to the slaughter of animals for this occasion. “We spare them this time from our lust for meat ” No malice is intended in the above comments by rojo an “anti” in ariels eyes.

  • Christopher Cochran MD says:

    I am honored to be recognized by name. Peta and I have a different idea about what an animal expert is but rest assured I am at least as passionate about wildlife as Peta just from a different perspective. I am extremely thankful for this forum and appreciate Peta and it’s passion for cause. Although I don’t usually agree with Peta I realize the importance of the organization being able to express viewpoints freely. I am extremely grateful to be able to express mine as well. Many of you wish that I would go away and I don’t blame you. I am happy you are all here expressing your opinions and reading mine. If we all agreed on everything nothing would ever change. All the best.

  • Brittany says:

    i only missed a few but im workin on it.

  • Aleasha says:

    I got a perfect 10! People who wear fur make me sick!

  • Ariel says:

    I think that was a very reasonable “guess” by the moderator to suggest that the frequent commenters halo snipe Dr. C. Mars and the “bad steve” are not PeTA members which I am VERY inclined to agree. However unless it was an oversight or just not worth mentioning my “guess” also would be that “rojo” should have been included. In fact I have reasonable suspicions aha! to “guess” that they are strongly antianimal rights. On another note at this time I would like to bring to forum’s attention that all of the above commenters are “assumed” to be of the human animal male species. However that doesn’t classify them as “gentlemen.” I came to this conclusion because more than anything else they love to “challenge” with their juvenile delinquent type of responsescomments the female ar’s activists those of whom STRONGLY point out their nonsense. So I think the accurate classification for them would be “woos” ie male wooses. I would also like to bring to the forum’s attention that I have certain reasonable suspicions about the seemingly sudden appearance of two particular females under another forum heading who had a tendency to side with a few of the above mentioned male wooses while giving the impression of being concerned ar’s activists.? Oh no wait sorry they were REAL “ar’s activists” giving their opinions which just happened to coincide with just a tad or defend a few of the male wooses. Just giving my opinions.

  • Mike Quinoa says:

    The Nuge is a good guitarist but he sucks big time as an animal rights activist. He should take his cue from Steve Vai B. B. King Kirk Hammett Jeff Beck Steve Morse John Jorgenson Joan Jett Steve Howe Paul McCartney Phil Collen Tom Scholz Eric Johnson Brian May Prince Richard Thompson Link Wray and others I can’t think of who are all vegn guitarists.

  • Mars says:

    “Dolphins can commit suicide in captivity?” Yea that’s why they have to wait 5 days for a handgun purchase. “Even though the sale of dog and cat fur is illegal in the US it is still imported from China illegally and falsely labeled as fur from other species” Wrong cat and dog fur is commonly sold in the U.S.. Examples of dogs Red Foxgray foxcoyotewolf. Example of cat fur Bobcatmountain lionlynx As for the domestic varietiesthey are also saleable though there is not much demand for “housecat fur” because of it’s usual very poor quality. Why would I pay to take a very biased propaganda “test”. A Hunter Education course and test is free. Let us know how you do.

  • Jaclyn says:

    Dolphins commit suicide in captivity??? o

  • Tamara says:

    Carla you’ve seen “The Devil Wears Prada” one too many times…snicker I like that you guys mentioned the Geico Caveman…

  • Ariel says:

    “Chief” of what or who the ad nauseum hatefilled attentionseeking loser antiar’s activists on here who vomit bile make concoctions distortions false accusations spout nonsense and absurdities etc. like a bunch of juvenile deliquents? if so I’ll agree to “chief. But “Mr.” doesn’t even come close. LOL

  • John Porter says:

    What percent chance is there that you are gay for not eating meat and sticking up for animals when you people would gladly abort a child or threaten the life of a hunter? 100 gay

  • Mr. Chief says:

    Tried it low score. But who cares? Trivial knowlege is useless Any idiot can memorize facts.

  • Mr. Chief says:

    I am not halo snipe anymore I’m Mr. Chief. It’s not free then!

  • Carla says:

    Ok Ok in Anna Wintour’s closet I thought all the above. But I didn’t know Dolphins can commit suicide in captivity?

  • Russell says:

    perfect 10!