Mepkin Monks to Shut Down Egg Factory Farm
Update: Great news! The monks at Mepkin Abbey now have a thriving mushroom business. After PETA’s protests, boycotts, and complaints to government agencies, the monks re-examined their egg farm and discovered that they can get all their needs met without harming animals.
The following was originally posted on December 20, 2007:
We’ve just heard the news that the monks at Mepkin Abbey have decided to phase out their egg-production business over the next year and a half following pressure from PETA, including protests of the monastery that are going on today. According to the Associated Press, Mepkin’s Father Stan Gumula said late last night that the focus on the monks’ practices as a result of PETA’s investigation has been too much of a distraction, and that they will be looking for a new industry to help meet their expenses.
PETA Vice President Bruce Friedrich points out that South Carolina had the 6th highest peanut production among U.S. states last year (quite how he knows such things, I have no idea), and recommends that the monks go into the booming business of peanut butter packaging, where they can pack the peanuts as tight as they like without any fear of our getting on their case about it. In fact, we might be their first customers. My own vote is more traditional—there’s nothing quite like a good Trappist Ale.
Whatever they end up deciding, this is nothing short of a Christmas miracle for the chickens who have suffered for so long at Mepkin Abbey, and we commend the monks for their compassionate decision.