‘Testing … One, Two, Three’

RESEARCHER: All right, bring him out.

Hold him down.

Let’s just get it over with.

MAN: Testing. One.
WOMAN: Two.
GIRL: Three.

GIRL: Come here.

MAN: I want to take you on a trip.

It won’t be pretty.

GIRL: Look.

What do we see?

RESEARCHER: Testing. Testing. Testing.

WOMAN: Animal testing.

MAN: They get hurt. Bad.

GIRL: Bad.

WOMAN: The kind of burning, …
GIRL: … bleeding, …
MAN: … fear-producing, …
WOMAN: … cage-circling, …
MAN: … screaming, …
GIRL: … screaming, …
WOMAN: screaming hurt that we shudder to even imagine.

MAN: All in the name of “research.”

GIRL: Testing. One.
MAN: Two.
WOMAN: Three.

WOMAN: Does a rabbit wear mascara in the wild?

GIRL: Do you hop around laying pellets in your pad? Hope not.

MAN: Animals react to drugs differently than we do.
WOMAN: Because mice are not little men.

GIRL: Because mice are not little men.

MAN: Because they can’t tell you how much it hurts.

WOMAN: Bottom line: Their systems are different than ours.

GIRL: Remember: It hurts.

MAN: They bleed just like we do.
WOMAN: They suffer just as we do.
GIRL: They feel lonely and sad just like we do.
MAN: They want to live …
WOMAN: … just like we do.
MAN: Because when it comes to pain, hunger, and thirst …
WOMAN: … and not wanting to die, …
MAN: … we’re all basically the same.

WOMAN: All this, while more sophisticated, non-animal test methods exist!

MAN: Because testing on animals gives faulty results.

WOMAN: Because it was wrong when we did it to orphans, blacks, G.I.s, and gypsies.

GIRL: And it’s wrong when we do it to animals.

WOMAN: Because we can’t explain what we’re doing to them. If we could, what would we say?

MAN: It is unscientific.

WOMAN: Unscientific.
MAN: You can’t accurately apply the results to humans. Because life in a steel cage is no life at all.

MAN: Because after all this, …
WOMAN: you know …
GIRL: … it’s just …
MAN: … plain …
WOMAN: … wrong.

RESEARCHERS: Testing. One. Two. Three. Testing. Testing.