Michael Jackson Made Out of Butter

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< 1 min read
thisislondon.co / CC
Michael Jackson

While people around the globe are trying to find appropriate ways to honor the late “King of Pop,” the state of Iowa has come up with one of the lamest ways we’ve seen so far.

Believe it or not, the organizers of this year’s Iowa State Fair are considering erecting a statue of M.J. made out of butter. While we can definitely appreciate the creativity of their suggestion, we think that they are going about it all wrong. Michael devoted much of his life and fortune to children’s health charities, and the notion of promoting artery-clogging butter to young passersby is quite the opposite of “healing the world”—and enough to make Mike roll over in his golden casket.

We do respect Iowans’ right to honor the late icon, so we’ve come up with a solution—one that’s good for children, cows, and Michael’s legacy. We’re suggesting that the fair make the statue out of Earth Balance, a dairy-free natural “buttery” spread, instead. By keeping their tribute to Mr. Jackson dairy-free, they’d be honoring his memory in a (cholesterol-free) way that’s fit for a king.

Written by Christine Doré

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