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Eating Fake Animals

Written by PETA | May 11, 2007

Veggie_Burger.jpgI want to start off today by talking about the veggie burger I created at a barbeque last night. Here’s how it worked: 1 Boca burger, 1 Chik’n patty, a ton of Bac’n bits, 2 slices of soy cheese, a healthy dose of vegenaise, guacamole, lettuce, and tomatoes. In just one sitting, I devoured three different fake animals, and it was amazing. Word on the street is that the folks over at PETA’s Veg Cooking website are going to be coming out with a food blog in the next couple of months, so I expect that—since it seems fairly clear that I am some kind of culinary genius—they will be wanting me as a consultant. If they ask nicely, I may even share with them my recipe for tater tots and ketchup.

Anyway, as today is day 5 of Be Kind to Animals Week, it seemed like as good a time as any to make the point that the single easiest and most effective way of being kind to animals is only eating fake ones. They’ve got pretty much every kind of fake animal these days, and I like to cook the little suckers up with garlic and douse them in steak sauce. And for anyone who holds themselves to a higher culinary standard than me (which, honestly, most people do), there are a ton of great vegan recipes on the aforementioned Veg Cooking website. Also, if you haven’t come across it already, you should check out the Vegan Lunchbox blog. That lady seriously knows what she’s doing.

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  • caramia216 says:

    New items for my allergic kin All items are corn soy free!! do contain walnuts Amy’s new Breakfast Patties Amy’s California Burger Gardenburger Southwest Original Garden I believe wheat as well but not positive

  • Zanabay says:

    Sounds delicious. My children and I make what we call “creolasoy” with elbow macaroni and a box of sloppy joe mix by “Fantastic World Foods”. Just add green pepperstomato paste a few mushrooms a touch of brown sugar. Follow directions for sloppy joe mix on box and you’ll have a whole lot of fun…children love it!

  • Char Newman says:

    Only trouble is Boca is now owned by Kraft and we all know about their history. I’d sooner choose Light Life products a great company with delicious substitutes for meat.

  • erosson says:

    I like the idea of eating fake animal. I am opposed to Animal cruelty but still I eat meat it frequently leaves me torn. Now I guess it works out well.

  • Patricia Flynn-Williams says:

    When I ate meat thirty years ago I LOVED barbeque. There is a frozen product called “Riblets” made by Gardenburger that tastes for all the world like barbeque ribs. It is wonderful. Add potato salad beans and cole slaw and there is absolutely no way you would feel deprived.

  • Marta says:

    Mmm sounds delicious! I always miss the fun stuff. o

  • Joel says:


  • Maya says:

    I was always left out at BBQs when I was a teen….nothing for me to eat. Thanks for making my summer Jack you’re hot!