Every now and then, my department at PETA gets together outside of work to do a little teambuilding, brainstorm some brilliant new ways to help animals, and swap nasty rumors about people in the other departments. For the most recent social event, we decided to hit up Johnny Rockets to take advantage of the 2 for 1 Streamliner deal I've been talking up. Apart from a few tense moments trying to talk my friend Joel down from ordering four veggie burgers just for himself, the whole thing went really smoothly. Mylie told us all about the latest weird hippie stuff she's been getting up to, Tracy (my boss) talked a bit about her husband's sweet-ass band, and the staff at Johnny Rockets loved seeing a table of 10 scarf down a week's supply of veggie burgers like they were nothing.

Anyway, there you have it, Johnny Rockets veggie burgers: Healthy, delicious, and 2 for 1 until the end of the month. I can highly recommend it if your office does department lunches like mine does. Hell, if you work someplace that doesn't spend all its money on helping animals, maybe you can even get them to pay for it.

One of the Iams products recalled after animal deaths

They've been dying in the Iams labs, and now they're dying in people's homes. After an unknown number of cats and dogs died of kidney failure from eating tainted pet food, Menu Foods, which is a contract manufacturer for Proctor & Gamble's Iams and Eukanuba brands, has recalled 60 million cans of pet food from stores nationwide. As a result, Proctor & Gamble has announced a major recall of certain types of its food throughout the country. You can learn more about the story here.

Proctor & Gamble is no stranger to killing dogs: They've been doing it efficiently and professionally for years, and they've developed numerous ways of getting the job done, such as cutting out huge chunks of muscle from their test subjects' legs and leaving them to suffer for days before they die—as our investigation into Iams a couple of years ago discovered. Now, of course, boycotting Iams has taken on a whole new meaning since the company has shown

One of the dogs made to suffer in Iams' tests

Casey Affleck is the man. Love his acting, love his attitude, love his beautiful wife, love everything about the guy. And since the indie flick Lonesome Jim and blockbusters Ocean’s 11 and 12 are a few of my favorite movies ever, I was psyched to hear that he’d shot a new “Veg Testimonial” ad for PETA.

We loved the ad so much we wanted to run it all over the place including Casey’s hometown of Boston, but the networks weren’t having it. First, we tried to show Food Network viewers what happens to animals before they’re fried, filleted, and fricasseed on TV, but advertising execs didn’t have the stomach for it. Then we went for E!, MTV, the TVGuide Channel and all eight broadcast stations in Boston. Ad execs said the scenes of animals in factory farms and slaughterhouses as Affleck explains why he is a vegetarian were “too graphic.” Whatever. It is 2007 after all, so we can get as much mileage out of the ad online as we could on TV anyway.

Check out the full feature, including an interview with Casey on the set, where he says, “When people ask me why I don’t eat meat or any other animal products, I say, ‘Because they’re unhealthy, and they’re the product of a violent and inhumane industry,’” Did I just hear an “amen” from the choir or what? I told you he was awesome.

Anyway, we’ll all be hearing a lot more from my boy in the next few months. He’s already wrapped on Ocean’s Thirteen, as well as his brother Ben Affleck’s directorial debut Gone, Baby, Gone, and personally, I’m most excited to see him in The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford with Brad Pitt. He’s got a big year coming up . . .

Earlier this month, it was announced that Dan Snyder, who owns the greatest football team in the world, has purchased Johnny Rockets, which happens to make the greatest fast-food veggie burger in the world. To celebrate this match made in heaven for vegetarian football fans, PETA has teamed up with Johnny Rockets to give away coupons for free Streamliner veggie burgers throughout the month of March. In the interests of full disclosure here, there are some strings attached, in the sense that you have to buy one first before you get your free one, but it's still a pretty sweet deal—besides, if you can't eat two veggie burgers in a sitting, other vegetarians will think you're a sissy, and nobody wants that. Also, while we're being honest with each other, I totally made up all that stuff about PETA doing this because of the Washington Redskins connection. I just got overexcited and carried away, and I'm sorry. How about I make it up to you with a free veggie burger?

Kathleen, not the sharpest knife in the drawer

If reality ever catches up with Reality TV, we're going to be in great shape as far as animal issues are concerned (though, like, Flava Flav will probably be President, which might cause some problems). Turns out that in Reality TV, when you make naive comments about how the fur industry works, you get voted off the show. On America's Next Top Model last night, one of the challenges was to tackle a controversial political issue, and poor Kathleen ("I like fur, it makes you look hot"), got stuck with fur. We're always looking for snappy sound bites to get our point across about the cruelty of the fur industry, so I couldn't get my pen and notebook out fast enough when Kathleen let drop this little nugget of wisdom:

Awww, sweetie, that's not how they make fur. I got done feeling sorry for her by, like, the fifth time she had to ask what it means to be "anti-fur," but it was a treat to hear Twiggy and the others express some real opinions about how screwed up it is to wear fur before voting her ass back to Brooklyn. If only there were some equivalent way of voting fur-flaunting airheads like the Olsen Twins into oblivion …

Attendees of the invitation-only Christian Lacroix show at Paris Fashion week this afternoon discovered that "I'd Rather Go Naked Than Wear Fur" is a whole lot more than just a catchy slogan when a PETA Europe supporter removed all her clothes, evaded security, and rushed onto the catwalk with an anti-fur banner. Here’s what astonished onlookers saw at the event:

Another protester, this time at the Valentino show, didn't quite make it onto the catwalk. You can click here to check out the NSFW picture of how that went, but before you do (I swear to you I’m not kidding about this), our legal department is making me ask you to check very carefully to make sure both that you’re 18 years old and that publishing or viewing nude photos is legal where you live. If neither of those things is true, don’t come crying to me when the police knock down your door and drag you away from your computer.

By way of a bit of editorial, this kind of tactic always seems to raise a lot of healthy debate, and I've heard good points made on both sides of the issue. Nonetheless, I have yet to hear a good argument made defending the actions of designers like Lacroix and Valentino, who directly fund people who skin, bludgeon, strangle, and electrocute animals for a living. For more information on that, click here. I don't know if I'd ever be able to do what these two activists did in Paris today, but I'm certain that I'd rather go naked than wear fur. If it ever does come to that point, though, I really hope that I’ll be allowed to do it in the comfort of my own home.

Dear Members of the Iditarod Trail Committee,

Every year, around this time, I start hearing about the vicious event you're responsible for in which dogs are beaten and abused into running up to 125 miles a day without any rest. In the last two years, seven dogs have been killed by the Iditarod, through freezing, ulcers, or just plain exhaustion—and I'm certain that similar fates are in store for the animals whose suffering you’re arranging this year. Of course, these casualties are just the ones that are publicized—the dogs who are bludgeoned or drowned by mushers because they don't measure up to Iditarod standards (or the ones who die alone in the tiny kennels they're confined to for most of their lives) tend not to make it into the newspapers that report on your bloody proceedings.

I'm not surprised that, like so many people who profit from archaic and abusive customs, you defend yourselves by invoking "tradition," but I can assure you that as more and more people learn that your tradition is one of cruelty, lies, and abject misery, it's not one that’s going to be around for much longer.

If you'd like any more information about what PETA's doing to ensure that these dogs' misery doesn't go undocumented, you can click here. We're encouraging compassionate people everywhere to contact the sponsors of this event—Wells Fargo, Daimler-Chrysler, and Chevron—and let them know exactly what they're supporting. I look forward to a time when your sadistic little race is a thing of the past.

Sincerely,

Jack Shepherd

To be honest, I don't think the Iditarod Trail Committee is going to be swayed by my letter, since it seems pretty clear that they're not exactly dog-lovers, but the companies that continue to sponsor this event need to know why they shouldn't. You can contact Wells Fargo here, Daimler-Chrysler here, and Chevron here.

The dreaded Olsen Twins have been spotted again, hiding their evil, flinty little eyes behind dark glasses and draping their malformed bodies in the skins of tortured animals. No need to hide your children and bar the windows just yet, though, as our dashing hero, PETA VP Dan Mathews, has come to the rescue with a trademark snarky comment:

If you do happen to come across Ashley or Mary Kate in a dark alley somewhere, it's important not to panic. But do be sure to call animal control immediately if it looks like any of those minks are still alive. And if you happen to run into Dan Mathews, try not to be sassy with him. It never goes well.

TMZ has the full story.

A lovely pic of Pam from her new-look website

I'm going to come clean with you guys and admit that I didn't know what Uggs were until I heard about this. I try to be trendy and keep my ear to the ground about this sort of thing, but apparently the whole Ugg thing has completely eluded me for, like, 10 years. Anyway, I'm told by my colleagues that they were this huge fashion phenomenon that got off the ground in a big way when Pamela Anderson started wearing them in her Baywatch days. Well, Pamela isn't wearing them anymore, and the story has gone everywhere—starting with People magazine. Here's what she had to say on the topic.

No wonder they call them Uggs

I know I've said this before, but I love you very much, Pamela. On a related note, you should check out the new design for Pam's website. It's very, very animal friendly. Did I mention that I love her?

Nothing says "Stop the bloody seal hunt" like a pile of dead, naked seal people outside your front door. We're hoping that the Canadian Prime Minister got that message loud and clear last week when these brave souls stripped off, covered themselves in fake blood, and held a “die-in” outside his office to symbolize the bloody seal-killing that happens every year on the ice floes off Newfoundland. Canada, I really do love you guys: the hockey, the maple syrup, the kickass national anthem—all that great stuff—but WTF with the baby-seal bludgeoning? Seriously: worst idea for a national tradition ever.