I’ve never personally had a Halloween adventure, but from all accounts, they’re a barrel of laughs. Check out this delightful e-card featuring the world-famous “Not a Nugget” chick, and have a great Halloween!

P.S. We're doing a demonstration tonight at our local KFC, where we're dressing up as skeletons and zombies and holding signs that say "I’d Rather be Dead than Eat Kentucky Fried Cruelty." I'll let you know how it goes ...

In the course of negotiations with a company like KFC—which refuses to make even minimal improvements in the lives of the billions of chickens it uses for profit—there is a time for subtlety and there’s a time for burning their corporate logo in effigy. This past week turned out to be of the latter sort. Check out the pic below from our awesome protest in Washington:

In related Colonel Sanders effigy news, I just discovered that PETA isn’t the only organization that has a longstanding KFC boycott. According to those omniscient folks over at Wikipedia, a Japanese baseball team called the Hanshin Tigers has failed to win a championship in more than 18 years due to what fans call “The Curse of the Colonel.” Apparently their run of bad luck started when a crowd of Tigers fans threw a Colonel Sanders statue into the river as part of a celebration.

So in case you’ve been looking for some more reasons to join PETA’s KFC boycott—in addition to the fact that KFC kills millions of chickens a year by boiling them to death—you can do it so that the much-maligned Hanshin Tigers can finally win the championship that has been stolen from them by a company that has nothing but contempt for animals, consumers, and Japanese baseball.

Somebody liberated the stereo from my car last week, which meant spending half my Saturday trying to get through to someone at my insurance company. To help forestall any suicidal impulses created by the smooth jazz that State Farm has selected for its hold music, I spent some time coming up with “Onion” style headlines for fake articles I want to write. Let me know which one you like best and I’ll write an article to accompany it and post it tomorrow: KFC Execs Pleased With New Animal Welfare CommitteeOld one just too “ornery and contrarian” claims CEO. Ugly People in Fur Coats Still Ugly, New Report FindsDraping yourself in a dead animal does not make you prettier, according to a recent study by the Department of Urban Haberdashery (DUH). Area Jerk Belittles Vegetarian“I like animals, too … to eat!” local meathead Alan Brown told a vegetarian acquaintance Friday. Brown admits that he did not “think of the joke [himself].”That’s all I’ve been able to come up with so far: If you can think of some of your own, let me know, and I’ll post the best ones throughout the week.