Here's what Jeff says about this week's masterpiece: "The strip is based on the sad measures that officials have to take in order to protect rhinos from poachers. And a little depravity thrown in for good measure."

He also let me know that, in honor of Earth Week, he sprayed this strip with 50 percent less pesticides. Which was very noble of him, I thought. Anyway, this one's a zinger—enjoy!

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To check out the archives of past strips, click here.

Amy from the VegCooking blog here. It's that time of the year again for The Great American Meatout—the annual grassroots diet education campaign. Supporters worldwide donate a little of their time to educate the public about delicious vegan cuisine by giving speeches, leafleting, providing food samples, and giving cooking demonstrations. This is exactly where I come in.

I'm confident in saying that I am more of a food expert than Jack, who has admitted to making the same meal for dinner every night for months at a time, which is why I'm here to share a Meatout recipe with you. Trust me, you should be happy it's me and not Jack. He would tell you to open a container of store-bought guacamole and just call it a day.

Since the goal of this day is to encourage meat-eaters to kick that nasty habit (and take the pledge to be veg), I think it's the perfect time to feature a faux-meat recipe. Sure, there are many great products you can buy from the store that require little to no preparation (a few good ones to try are the Morningstar Farms Meal Starters, Boca Chik'n Patties, and Tofurky slices), but if you want to put in a little extra effort—which might be all that's needed to convince your loved ones that they, too, can go veg—try this recipe below for mock crab cakes served up on toasted crostini and topped with a little lemon-dill mayo. Yum.

When your loved ones are done eating, and in awe of how fantastic vegan food can be, don't forget to ask them to take the pledge to be veg.

Mock Crab Cakes With Lemon-Dill Mayo

For the Cakes:
1/2 cup finely diced onions
1/4 cup finely diced carrots
Oil for sautéing
2 tsp. minced garlic
2 lbs. firm tofu, crumbled
1 1/2 Tbsp. cornstarch
1/4 cup nutritional yeast
1/8 cup dry white wine
1 Tbsp. salt
1/2 tsp. ground white pepper
Juice of 1 lime

• Sauté the onions and carrots in a little oil until soft, about 3 to 5 minutes.
• Add the garlic and sauté 1 minute longer. Let cool completely.
• Add the remaining ingredients, mixing well. Let cool in the refrigerator for 30 minutes.

• Pulse the panko bread crumbs briefly in a food processor to form a medium-grain crumb.
• Add the Old Bay, salt, and pepper and mix well.

• Preheat the oven to 450°F.
• Form the tofu mixture into 1 1/2-oz. cakes. Dredge the cakes in the breading mix, being certain to cover all surfaces completely.
• Sauté the cakes in a little oil over medium heat in a large, flat-bottomed pan for 3 to 5 minutes on each side, or until browned and crispy.
• Slice the baguette on the diagonal into 1/2-inch slices, then brush each side with olive oil.
• Bake the baguette slices for 3 to 4 minutes, being careful not to toast completely. Remove from the oven.
• Top each crostini with one tofu cake, a dollop of lemon-dill mayo, and dill garnish, if desired.

• Combine all the ingredients in a small bowl and stir until just combined. Chill until serving.

By this point, the entire world knows that Eliot Spitzer’s call girl was on Girls Gone Wild, but I bet she never did anything quite like this. While I focus my full attention on resisting the urge to make a joke featuring the word “udderly,” please take a moment to enjoy these pictures of Cassandra—star of PETA’s Milk Gone Wild 2: at the Carwash—baring it all for the Spring Break crowd at Miami Beach. She reeled them in with the free soy ice cream and the prosthetic udders (who could possibly resist that combination?), then hit ‘em with the “Milk Sucks” information. According to Cassandra, one photographer was so moved by the Meet Your Milk video that he stuck around to help her pass out leaflets. Well played, young lady. Well played.

In keeping with today’s theme of having other people do my work for me while I type up my notes from SXSW, here’s an animated short by Mark Fiore that my friend Matt just sent me. Enjoy!

Posting may be a little bit erratic today, as I’m trying to type up about 3 billion pages of notes from the South by Southwest Interactive Media Conference I attended last week. More on that later, but in the meantime, you may want to check out this awesome interview with PETA’s irreverent VP Dan Mathews, who’s about to embark on a nationwide tour in support of the paperback release of his book, Committed. Check the calendar on his myspace page if you want to catch one of his upcoming booksignings.