I'm willing to bet my last Goldenberg Peanut Chew that you love comedian/writer Carol Leifer just as much as I do. Even if her name doesn't sound familiar, millions of Seinfeld fans can thank her for penning countless "I-laughed-so-hard-vino-shot-out-of-my-nose!" moments.

Carol recently tossed all animal products from her fridge—no more milk stolen from calves, no more eggs from miserable hens, and no more bacon from pigs gone crazy from confinement—and she sat down with PETA to film the following vegetarian testimonial (Before you watch it, I suggest you put that wine down, lest you spray Chardonnay all over your keyboard):

One of my favorite lines: "I recently became vegan because I felt that as a Jewish lesbian, I wasn't part of a small enough minority. So now I'm a Jewish lesbian vegan."

If that video wasn't enough hilarity for you, you can check out here and here for other versions of the video. Plus, we've got 10 copies of Carol's book—When You Lie About Your Age, The Terrorists Win: Reflections on Looking in the Mirror—to give away too. Win yours by letting us know, in the comments section below, the funniest thing you tell people when they ask why you went vegetarian.

The contest ends on July 23, 2009, and we'll choose the 10 most hilarious comments as the winners on July 24, 2009. Be sure to read our privacy policy and terms and conditions, as you're agreeing to both by commenting. Good luck!

Written by Karin Bennett

Yesterday, crowds descended on Los Angeles' Staples Center to pay respects to the "King of Pop," but it was "Her Royal Hotness," PETA's Lettuce Lady, who stole the show outside Michael Jackson's memorial. Wearing only her signature lettuce bikini and a single, white sequined glove, Christina Cho held a mirror reading, "Go Vegetarian for the Man in the Mirror."

A line of reporters from local television stations and newswires, including Associated Press and Reuters, waited to talk to PETA's Lettuce Lady.

Her message was inspired by Michael Jackson's hit, "The Man in the Mirror," which pondered the impact of personal change:

What's the easy answer for those who want to make a difference in their health, animal suffering, the environment, and starving children like those featured in the song's video? Go vegetarian!

Our message was simple: Take a moment to reflect, and then "make that change."

Written by Karin Bennett