An open letter to the citizens of Iowa:

It's too late to save the poor pigs who were killed after they escaped a flooded southeastern Iowa farm after being left to drown, swam several miles through raging floodwaters, and scrambled atop a sandbag levee, where sheriff's officials shot them for fear that they would weaken it, but as citizens of Iowa, you can all do something in solidarity to save other clever, charismatic pigs: Go vegetarian.

Millions of pigs are hung upside-down, scalded, and bled to death, often while they're still conscious, in slaughterhouses every year. Pigs feel pain every bit as much as we do, are horrified at the sight and smells of the slaughterhouse, and are afraid to die. Like us, they fight for their lives and struggle to avoid suffering.

There is no reason for any pigs to die such tragic, violent deaths—ever. Tasty, healthy, and humane mock meats—including Tofurky sweet Italian sausages, Morningstar Farms veggie dogs, Yves Veggie Cuisine's Canadian veggie bacon and deli slices, and other faux-pork products—are available in many supermarkets and health-food stores.

By choosing vegetarian foods instead of animal flesh, each one of us can save more than 100 animals every year. See GoVeg.com for more information, and click here to get a free "Vegetarian Starter Kit."

Someone should probably tell this pig and cow that they’re not going to win any elections if their only platform is raising taxes, but the argument is a solid one: In addition to being a leading cause of global warming, meat causes cancer and heart disease—driving health-care costs through the roof. Alcohol, tobacco, and gasoline are subject to a “sin” tax, so meat should be too. We’re asking congress to tax meat at 10 cents per pound to offset its staggering costs, and these two have been following the presidential candidates all around the campaign trail to make that point. In a Mustang Convertible, which gives the whole thing a bit of flair. This pic’s from one of the Iowa stops: